Recently, I have been looking at my role in this world. I am not one of those people who believe I have a mighty hand in choosing my basic role. After living almost 50 years full of adventures and challenges, my basic role has remained rather consistent regardless of the position or situation. Although, I do believe I have control over my attitude and how I approach life, my role is somewhat beyond my control. We all have many hats and responsibilities in our lives ~ mine are daughter, friend, companion, caretaker, healer, wife, mother, coordinator, facilitator, artist, herbalist, naturalist, planner, student, conservationist and lover.

While I worked on creating the above list and looked it over, it simply screams ~ to serve others. Ever since I can remember, I have been driven to contribute to making the world a better place for my family, friends, community and myself. Sometimes, in very small ways, other times in more noticeable ways. When I think about it, I do not feel comfortable with taking more than my share or putting myself before others. My husband constantly reminds me of the emergency speech on airplanes, “Put the oxygen mask on first.” But, honestly I’ve always felt there was more than enough oxygen available after I help others first. In fact I feel giving first always returns tenfold to me. I really can’t help myself. No matter how hard I tried to put on the “oxygen mask” first, I would get distracted by someone else’s needs.

Put the oxygen mask on first before you assist others.

I found that the only way I could truly take care of my needs is to be alone so I could recharge. Then there were no distractions from “me.” I am not saying this is a healthy way of navigating the world; it is just my way of coping. When I was single and living on my own, being alone was a very easy thing to do. I just would not make plans or answer the phones for a period of time, usually a week or so. Sure, I would go to work, but once I got home, I was alone to refuel. After my time of refocusing and nourishing my mind, body and spirit, I was good to go out and could take care of the needs of others again. Now that I am a mother of a ten year old, wife, daughter of aging parents in their 8os, and dealing with my body new needs while going through the “Change” it’s not so easy. I try my best to be out in nature, sit, walk, and listen to sounds of life around me. This helps but does not really replenish my energy supply.  There just is not enough oxygen to go around right now. I know this too shall pass, but it’s a bitch to go through.

What do you do to refuel yourself during times of great need? Please share and I will continue to share.